It’s Sunday morning and you’re up today without your mom screaming at you to get ready for church (usually you’re sleep deprived from forcing yourself to stay up to watch SNL). She can have the other 51 weeks for that, but not today. Today is Monopoly Day! You’ve seen the ads all week, and you’re dying to find out which Monopoly properties you will start with.
You hop out of bed and go straight out the door. Peeing and brushing your teeth will have to wait. And who cares if your neighbors see you in your ugly mustard yellow Gap sweatsuit that you use as pajamas? They know what’s up. A million dollars are on the line…
Snapping off the rubber band from the massive Sunday roll, you quickly sort out the essentials in order of importance:
1. Comics (in color today!)
2. McDonald’s Monopoly game board!
3. The weekly ads and coupon section
You’re hoping for a quick Mediterranean and Baltic monopoly for $50 as you peel off the first piece…
Free Small Fries. Ok… solid…
The next piece… Park Place!
Just the false hope you needed to spark the McDonald’s Super Size obsession for the next month.
I think McDonald’s should have really messed with people by alternating between Park Place and Boardwalk as the common piece each year.
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